nightmare being 19

Nightmare Being 19

I got this this crippling fear of being average
In this perfect world
Like it’s me versus all of these
Sexy and confident girls

I’m so awkward, embarrassing
Everyone’s on something
I’m such a loner in here
These bodies are paper thin
It makes me hate my skin
Wanna disappear

I’m honestly scared right now
I feel like a child left out
On my own being weird at the party
Everyone’s kissing everybody
When is a polite time to leave?
When did life escalate?
And when did my friends all change?
Now I don’t recognize anybody
So damn lonely
It’s a nightmare tryna be
It’s a nightmare trying to be 19

Weird how I used to be happpy dressed up as myself
Right now I’d pay to be just about anyone else

I’m red-faced and fumbling
The perfect mannequin
Model the thoughts of my peers
A copy and paste it girl
Done tryna to save the world
Just tryin’ my best to fit in

I’m honestly scared right now
I feel like a child left out
On my own being weird at the party
Everyone’s kissing everybody
When is a polite time to leave?
When did life escalate?
And when did my friends all change?
Now I don’t recognize anybody
So damn lonely
It’s a nightmare tryna be
It’s a nightmare trying to be 19

I don’t know what to do with this
Hanging on by my fingertips
I bet they all think I’m a freak
It’s a nightmare tryna be
It’s a nightmare trying to be 19
Everybody else got a plan
I don’t even know who I am
Is there something wrong with me?
It’s a nightmare tryna be
It’s a nightmare tryna be 19